To the undergraduates as a group we leave what is left of the faculty after we are done with them. We did our level best to unsettle their minds, and torture their bodies -- in other words -- break them down for the kill. Some have faltered by the way; but others are still holding out strong. These stalwart few we bequest to you -- may they serve you in all the strange, fiendishly sadistic ways they have served us.

     Also to the undergraduates we leave you the rugged buildings of our noble Alma Mater. May you use it with ever loving care, always mindful that each one of the torture chambers known as rooms costs the ridiculous sum of $10,000! We also do fervently hope that you will strive, struggle, sweat, in the noble cause of transforming our Sahara-like campus into a green-grassed award; even if it means transporting all of Zellwood's muck lands. To you, too, we leave the concrete slab we worked so hard to finance. May you acquire many happy blisters dancing on it!

     JEANNIE JONES leaves her fans to LIZ BENNETT; she has found they work admirably in chasing too eager beaus. JOANN HORVATH wills her old dancing tights to KATHY BURKE, and trusts they will reap her as many "wolf calls". DEWEY RAMSBY leaves all of his bubble gum to JANE MITCHELL, with these words of wisdom -- "When in doubt, blow!" KEN LAMEN leaves his crayons and that pair of embroidered jeans to anyone bold and brave enough to use them. RICHARD GIANNINI, somewhat reluctantly, leaves SIGRID BERGSTROM to STEVE STEVENSON, and trusts he may have weekend visitation privileges. FRAN USSERY gives her vitality to JEANIE BRITT, in the hope that it will keep her from being tardy. FRANK FERGUSON wills his football shoes to BILL HUNTER, with this greeting -- "Many happy flat feet!" FRED GOOD bequests his batted Latin book to TIM BASSLER, with these instructions--"Dangerous! Keep out!" LAID GANN, in the cause of all punctured eardrums, leaves SANDY FLOWERS his bass voice. JUDY REDING gives her life-sized effigy of JULIUS MULLINS to JULIE HAYNIE. JACK BILLINGHAM gives his favorite tranquilizing pills to ROGER ATKINSON, in the hope that they will make him stop beeping like Sputnik. STU SMITH wishes to leave his sense of humor to GARY HOUMES, but we won't blame Gary if he refuses it. BOB WHIPPLE happily bestows his Math book to MIKE MULLIGAN, with the warning that the answers in the back of the book are wrong. MAX MORRIS leaves the Honor Code to CONNIE MCDOWELL, in the hope that she can put it across. JOANN ROSS leaves her bouncy personality to SHARON SINDAD; PUDD MUDD leaves that quiet way with women to JOHN DELGADO; RUSTY DOOLITTLE gives his skill as an athlete to MIKE BORN; JOHN CASH says he's going to need all he's got to get through high school. SUSAN CHACE leaves her way with words to PATSY TEMPLE. DAVID RIDDLE leaves three old batteries to RICKY MILLER.